30 Things only People in Hawaii Do

Yeah…there is a GOOD LIST of things only people in Hawaii do…damn…the list could go ON and ON, but we’ll probably only have time to go over around 30 of them…


Talk story with someone you run into at the gas station for an hour

Feel guilty about not going outside for the day

Only OAHU—
We are more concerned about how long it will take to get somewhere, not how many miles. With traffic it’s not the miles that matters its that hour in traffic we dread.

We don’t go on the H1 Highway during morning or evening rush hour unless we have no choice

We pay no attention to time in Hawaii unless it involves work and even then we are usually late.

Most of us don’t consider ourselves part of the United States and we refer to Hawaii as the Rock or God Country and the other 48 States as the Mainland…We consider Alaska its own Country and call it Alaska.

We love Spam and make anything and everything with it while the mainland thinks its gross.

We don’t give directions, we use land marks…like park your car at the Kahana fish pond, walk across the street, walk past the yellow shrimp truck then go left at the yellow no hiking sign.

We are very selective when it comes to eating dessert. Malasada’s, Shave Ice, Mochi ice cream, Coco Puffs…etc

When it gets to be in the 60’s in the Winter people in Hawaii are freezing and so they get their winter cloths out like boots, socks over our slippahs, jackets, hoodies, pullovers, sweaters and beanie hats

We don’t watch the sports news or weather in Hawaii as our sport teams suck…but if there is a big swell, we’ll check the weather for the surf, but the rest of the year why bother our weather is always perfect out.

When on the beach getting a tan and it starts to rain we stay and wait it out for 10-15 mins while everyone else packs up and we have the beach to ourselves after the quick shower stops.

We call anyone older than us Auntie or Uncle even though they are not related. We also call friends Cousin, Braddah or Sistah

We don’t have Flip-Flops…we have Slippers cuz we slip them off and on all day and when we go in and out of the house.

It’s not called Soy Sauce here in Hawaii…it’s called Shoyu

It’s a constant struggle arguing with your friends on which beach to go to…the struggle is real.

We just don’t go to the Movies and get Buttered Popcorn…We get the Hawaiian Hurricane Crunchy Mochi seaweed and Buttered popcorn mix.

Here in Hawaii we don’t care what we wear as long a it’s comfortable and laid back and we don’t care what you think either

There is no LEFT or RIGHT in Hawaii only MAUKA or MAKAI…Toward the mountain or ocean

We live with Geckos in our homes…they eat all the bugs and they are good luck cuz the Gecko comes from the Mo’o, the Lizard Aumakua and spiritual protector

We gather our own food, from friends, family and our aina may it be while hiking or in our backyards or hunting or fishing. The rest we shop for. It’s just too expensive.

We eat Rice and Mac Salad with most our meals

I haven’t been to the beach in forever means you haven’t been to the beach for a week.

We run our cars in Hawaii on empty and try to push the limits on that.

We replace tires, brakes and suspension parts on our cars more often than anyone because of our horrible roads and potholes.

We bitch and complain we’ll never see our favorite band in concert…and we won’t…they never come to Hawaii…never!

We know down to which day of year Ants, Roaches, Centipedes and Millipedes come out of the wood work to haunt us

We call ants the Black Ninjas of the night and Sharks the Tax collector

Only we know how dirty Waikiki beach is and so we don’t swim there

Only on OAHU can we not find parking and when we do it’s for COMPACT CARS only when most of us have SUV’s or Trucks

We’ll eat whatever is on sale during $5 Friday and make every effort to eat as many tacos as we can on $2 Taco Tuesday

We don’t share secret spots with our friends cuz they will tell their friends and then no more secret, but we’ll tell visitors cuz you’ll never find the place on your own when you come back

17 thoughts on “30 Things only People in Hawaii Do

  1. Great show guys! The enjoyment of this topic really showed through with the enthusiasm both you displayed. Enjoyed it ๐Ÿค™๐Ÿป

  2. Hey guys!
    Thanks for a great podcast. Every once in a while you guys say you want to do more positive stuff in the podcast. I say — keep the negative coming!

    There’s too much out there about Hawaii being some kind of paradise. It’s not! It’s got nice weather and beaches, all right, but it’s inhabited by human beings, not angels. So it’s just like any other place in the world, with all the normal human problems. It’s really important to keep that in perspective, especially for people who are considering moving.

    So keep bitchin’! It’s my favorite part of the show, and the most informative one, I think!

  3. I posted the link before but Scenic Hawaii Channel 1001 videos can be seen on their site but are better just streamed directly off of YouTube?


    Plus, apparently that one person criticizing hasn’t listened to the show very much or very closely? The easiest solution for her is to make her OWN show then or just stick to the far more family friendly Hawaii Vacation Connection podcasts? The show’s a labor of love, you dedicate plenty of your time and own money to do it and for damned sure you have the right to curse if you feel like it or delve into subjects others may feel uncomfortable about like your “Sex in Hawaii” episode!!! Hell, if you were forced to hold back and do a show that you’re not enjoying WTF would you bother, right?

  4. I agree with Kathy. Too many people move to Hawaii expecting pure paradise and a reality check is much needed. Life follows you wherever you go. My favorite part of your podcasts are the first half so keep up the good work and keep the f*bombs coming!

    Wayde- quit saying you didn’t vote for Trump. You DID with your protest vote for Johnson. Buckle your seatbelt buddie! He’s just been in office for one week and the environment is well on it’s way to being fucked as well as my reproductive rights. Mahalo Wayde!

    • We have no intention to change what we do…so if listeners don’t like it they can fuck off…NOW Mevanie….Lets get to the bullshit you wrote in the second part of your comment, because you should know I don’t let bullshit like that slide…Let me break down the Bullshit you spewed: FIRST OFF…You sound like a Liberal…so I will assume you are…you voted for Clinton…I will assume that as well. NOW…you would NEVER vote for TRUMP because you think he’s a lying, arrogant, narcissistic, bigot who wants to take away your rights to kill your own child that has no rights anyways etc, etc…Hope I’m right so far…NOW…Image you hated CLINTON just the same and you had your List of reasons as well…would you vote for her???? If you hated Clinton just as much as Trump, if you had been a decent human being with a conscience, NO, you wouldn’t vote for her, nor would you vote for him…The lesser of two evils is still EVIL! If you believe in voting for โ€œthe lesser of two evils” all you are is a political prostitute. I voted my conscience and IT WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO! I learned from my Military Father and I hope you remember this before you tell ME what me vote means…”Voting for a Third Party, contrary to Political Propaganda, is NOT a wasted vote…Only an unprincipled vote is a wasted vote.” I have a right as an American to vote who I choose would be the best Commander and Chief to run this Country and CLINTON or TRUMP wasn’t it. They are both an EMBARRASSMENT to our Country as far as I’m concerned! By the way when it comes to killing your own child…Scalia had been there for 30 years…nothing change with your right to kill your own child over those years and if another is put in his place like Scalia nothing will change either…that’s fear mongering from the Liberal Propaganda Machine. Controlling your reproductive rights is nothing to be proud of however…Since Roe vs Wade 60 MILLION CHILDREN have been Murdered and around the World 50 Million Children are Murdered every year!…does that make you proud? BUT there is good news…WOMEN are starting to realize MURDER is not the way to go…at the HEIGHT of Abortions in the United States there had been 1.5 Million Abortions a year, BUT it has steadily declined every year to 650 thousand in 2016 so there is hope for the female race to choose COMPASSION over Murder! I don’t have a problem with them being performed before 4 months for any reason, may it be a women’s right to choose, because of health of the women or rape etc. This is a heated debate, but I base LIFE and DEATH not on conception and religious beliefs, but purely on SCIENCE and you IN NO WAY can argue that. During the 4-5 month (16-20 weeks) in the womb the Fetus becomes a child with a heart beat, hearing, senses, feeling and full brain function as well as a full nervous systems and spinal cord…at this stage you have a CHILD not a fetus and any abortion that takes place at this stage is MURDER! You women can bitch and argue all you want, but if you can sit there and have a 5-7 month almost fully grown child removed from your womb and not think you just murdered your child…well, you are one sick mother fucker and the State or federal Government needs to step in and and protect the rights of that Child because the mother clearly can’t do it. NOW…the environment…As you know I run one of the biggest environmental nonprofits in Hawaii, but being out there and doing field work it’s beyond frustrating and so discouraging YOU HAVE NO IDEA! …YES, I am VERY VERY concerned with what TRUMPS intentions are and if he continues to pursue this direction we will fight him tooth and nail, BUT let me tell you some truth and reality about the environment…IN CASE YOU DIDN’T KNOW…Humans are not the main cause of what’s happening to our world and fossil fuels have only been in use for 100 years, if we think we are the cause of global warming alone we give ourselves way too much credit, but then again, we as Humans are pretty damn Arrogant…Global Warming has been happening for millions of years…Global Warming, Global Cooling…how often do we hear that term…lol, that’s because we as humans have only been on this Earth for a blink of the Earths eye which is 4.5 Billion Years old, our Galaxy is 14 Billion years old, depending where the Earth is in the solar system and where it is in the Galaxy determines THE MAJORITY of the warming and cooling cycles, Ice ages have been happening for billions of years as well as heating cycles…Naturally Volcanoes, Comets and Asteroids over millions of years make an added impact on these cycles. You don’t hear this often, but Warming cycles or Global Warming happens before an ICE AGE, the poles MELT and the fresh water flow into the salt oceans…fresh water stops pushes the salt water to the bottom because salt water is denser…Once that happens the ocean conveyor belt and currents of the ocean stop from flowing, once the water stops flowing the Fresh water from the poles freeze over and the Ice age begins until some natural disaster melts the ice or our location in our solar system and galaxy changes which happens every 100 thousand years, but we also have MINI Ice ages which happens every 12,000 years or so…We are overdue for the mini Ice Age, but I will assume it’s being delayed because of Humans and the carbon we are emitting into the atmosphere, but no matter, the Mini Ice Age will be here in 500 hundred years no matter what we do…it’s the cycle of the Earth, you can only change that for so long. We have already passed the “POINT OF NO RETURN” when it comes to saving the environment for the HUMAN RACE, we can delay our end for only so long…our nonprofit knows it…scientists know it…Our Children and Children’s Children don’t and it’s unfortunate that they will be DOOMED…all we can do is slow the end process down, but I often think why…why not get it over with already. Humans are war mongering, selfish, greedy, ignorant, arrogant, self righteous and a very very dirty and disgusting species who has murdered, enslaved and destroyed each other, every other species on earth and our planet…it’s about time we are REMOVED from this Earth so it can start a new and cleanse itself of our embarrassing and disgraceful species again…maybe what comes out on the other side will be more Human than Human and we can start all over again after we have learned from our mistakes. I hope this was eye opening and you learned something…You may not like everything I posted or post, but you have to respect my passion for such topics. Aloha~

  5. funny how you end your incredibly aggressive rant with the word “aloha”. seriously, man? a while back you had an episode where you were a bit perplexed that some Hawaiians thought white people should not be using the word aloha. This is why.

    oh, and you should look at this:

    • Facts hurt, I know Kathy…at one point you like the bitching and rants on the Podcast, but now you don’t? She attacked the integrity of my vote and so I defended myself…and yes I ended it with Aloha…You can have a difference of opinion, argue and still end it with love and compassion…BUT if you have listened to many of our podcasts you would also know Kanaka Maoli showed all Aloha, but if you didn’t, if you disrespected them or questioned their integrity they would crush your skull in and rip your heart out! Don’t make this into race baiting…I’m not going there with you. As for the Global Warming and the Global artsy Chart you sent me…I have seen that link a long time ago…not sure why sending it to me changes the facts I posted…It lines up exactly with what I posted in my Paragraph…that file link is more to explain to Idiots about the cycles of the Earth over the last 20,000 years…which as I have said before, is a BLINK OF AN EYE to the Earth. The last Minor ICE AGE happened about 22,000 years ago and the Last Mini Ice Age happened at about 11,500 years ago and a SUPER SMALL ice age happened back in the 1600’s…at that point the chart shows it was -4 degrees at the last Minor Ice Age…today we are looking at +2 degrees…about a 6 degree jump over the last 20,000 Years in total…TECHNICALLY…We are in an inter-glacial period today called the HOLOCENE PERIOD ( Which is the Retreat of ice at the poles, which means ice is no longer expanding beyond the 22,000 year limit…meaning the ice still expands and retreats every year, it just never expands past the 22,000 year limit, but DOES contract past it…so we are slightly losing ice every year ) of the LAST GREAT ice age that began 2.6 million years ago and in between those super ice Ages we have large, mini and small Ice Ages. So we are at the end of the last Ice Age and entering the Warming Cycle that is coming either way if it has to do with us or not…We are simply Speeding things up! Between the Year 2200-2500 we should be looking at a total of a 11 degree change…to about 7+ Degrees, this chart only goes to 2100. SO…if you DID look at that Artsy Chart you see that at the year 2100 an optimistic Scenario would put the TEMP at +2 Degrees…concerning the cycle of the Earth I would say we would be here without Human interference anyway…YES, I have always said humans have played a role in the Warming of the Earth and speeding up the warming cycle, but with this Human interference, AS THE CHART SHOWS, I see the Worst case Scenario of an additional 2 degrees because of Human interference putting us at a total of +4 Degrees instead of +2 Degrees without Human interference. So over the last 22,000 years we would have a +6 Degree increase naturally or a +8 Degrees increase with Human interference. By 2500 (if Humans don’t change their ways, which they won’t) we should be at a 7 degree increase which would increase the total Temperature by +11 Degrees from 22,000 years ago because of Human Behavior. This 2 Degree Temp change because of Humans is HUGE…for us…but on a Earthly scale not so much…for us as Humans it will change everything and as we continue to grow as a species and destroy everything in site and wipe out more land and forests for homes, cities and businesses we are actually destroying our species by expanding it…by 2500 the Temp will increase even faster and head us down the road to the next ice age 500 years ahead of time…For us as Humans that’s HUGE…we only live to be around 100 years old, but for the Earth it means nothing. We are not going to change anything…Global warming is here…the next ice age will only come faster, but it’s coming either way. If we TRULY wish to slow it down by 1,000 years we do have options… 1.) Stop population growth (can only have one child per family…NEVER going to happen) 2.) Stop Factory Farming completely ( try telling people they can’t eat animals anymore) 3.) Eliminate all Fossil Fuels and revert to Solar, wind, Hydro, Bio, Geo and the biggest one that no one talks about because it’s free…electromagnetic Free Energy (GOOD LUCK with everyone getting free energy…too much greed) 4.) Wipe China off the face of the Earth (never going to happen…China, by far, is in the Lead for Destroying the Earth in all facets of Global warming, from pollution, to population growth to Species extinction) 5.) Mark all existing RAINFORESTS as well as Threatened or endangered species UNTOUCHABLE with the penalty of death if found guilty and expand current Rainforests and animal nature preserves even if it displaces millions of people (good luck) These are the 5 major causes of Global Warming…Do you seriously think we have any chance to change as a species to change these things in the next 10-20 years…because that’s all the time we have left before it’s too late. The only Honest way for the Global Elite to stop this is either NUCLEAR WAR or Hope for an Asteroid. Sad…but being real.

  6. Hey guys, good and informative podcast…totally true about the feeling guilty about not being outside enjoying Hawaii. I was sick on my last day on the North Shore and I was so annoyed that I missed out. Planning on coming again in August or September for our 10th wedding anniversary. Aside from that, Jeff wants me to share that he aligns with many of your viewpoints in your previous posts above Wayde(please don’t get him started, ha). Anyway, hope all is well. Meghan and Jeff

    • That suX you had been sick your last day Meg…bummer! YES, YES…Lets PLAN better and do a PODCAST together next time you two are out for your 10th and we can do a custom tour with you guys…off road the west side, Paddle board and such…We’ll have fun! Tell Jeff thank you…I’m not crazy I guess…lol…sometimes I go off and what you see on Tour may sometimes be different than what you get on the Podcast…lol…I try to be more professional on my Tours and I try to show Aloha on the Podcast as much as possible…but the Boston always comes out. You just can’t change this kid ๐Ÿ˜‰ lol. Can’t wait to see you guys again! Stay in touch!

  7. Hey Guys!
    Just wanted to let you know this was a great podcast. Now that we’re here, we’ve already noticed how thin our blood has become! We find ourselves wearing sweats the minute the sun goes down.
    We’ve been here since Halloween, and while I agree that it would’ve been sweet to have had 20K in the bank when we got here,we’ve been very fortunate to have weathered the winter slowdown and are rebuilding our finances in relative comfort.

    It’s funny to start to see the nuances of life that are specific to Hawaii living. I’ve caught myself speaking differently since I’ve been here. I’m more relaxed, and I feel healthier because it’s simply not as stressful as it was on the mainland.

    I wanted to thank you guys for staying supportive, the kids love this place Mayra loves it, and I am so in love with the Aina that I am never going to leave until I’m dead.

    PS – Bruce, you said you gave a presentation. Don’t forget to call me for your next one. I’m happy to help – It’s what we do!

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