Guess what day it is??? It’s Fuck Me Friday…no no it’s…Free-For-All Friday…no no it’s…ALOHA FRIDAY! Weeeeeeeee…for real…We gonna call this one FREE FOR ALL FRIDAY because if we called it ALOHA FRIDAY and new listeners chimed in for a listen they may be in for FAR MORE than they bargained for and we just don’t want those assholes commenting negatively on these two assholes…feel US?

Seriously…We have just been VERY busy last two weeks and the both of us haven’t had time to get a podcast out there…No way we could go 3 weeks without a show…You guys NEED US too much…may it be on your HORRIBLE drive to work or a PUMP UP for the Gym to listen to…We needed to get a show done…We had two weeks of news and Bullshit to cover here and the truth is we had been so busy this week we really didn’t have time to figure out a solid subject matter for this week…So what we are saying is we fucked up and had been completely unprepared to do a show this week! lol…What? You want us to fucking lie to you?

We know you guys love us…support the show, leave comments and donate to this Shit Show going…so yeah…lol here we are moutha phuckers! lol

We promise next week we’ll have a quest and be FULLY PREPARED to kick it out of the park for next weeks show…ok…so just give us a break and enjoy the Banter back and forth for this Episode of the Podcast…Much Mahalos kids!

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Time to wake up out of your HAWAII FANTASY so you can enter REALITY…HAWAII REALITY that is…This isn’t a Negative show…We just want you to be well aware of the reality of living in Hawaii and the things you should know about…We do have some issues here you should educate yourselves on before you come here as well as when you visit or move here…

Buy LOCAL…we have a serious Food problem here and the future of our Food Security is at the center of it…be AWARE and help the islands out.

We need to ensure Hawaii will have a Sustainable future.

Hawaii and the Native Hawaiian people have a MOVEMENT…Learn and Respect it.

We have SERIOUS Energy problems and they are the HIGHEST in the United States!

HOUSING is one more major concern and problem we have been talking about since we started this show years ago and it’s only getting worse. You will have a very hard time affording a home on OAHU and others are figuring this out and either moving back to the mainland or the other islands pushing the cost of homes and property higher on those islands.

Don’t get sick in Hawaii or don’t BE sick in Hawaii…the HEALTHCARE in Hawaii is not the best and may cause you some major issues or problems if you have a health problem…you may need to move to deal with heart or cancer issues and if you live on any other island than Oahu…you may need to fly into Oahu weekly or monthly to deal with your health problems…you may even need to move to Oahu for good if you have a major issues.

This is a warning and a heads up if you move to Hawaii…there are a million reasons to move to Hawaii, but there are also major concerns on why not to…as long as you know what you are dealing with and are prepared you should be able to manage Paradise 😉




30 Things only People in Hawaii Do

Yeah…there is a GOOD LIST of things only people in Hawaii do…damn…the list could go ON and ON, but we’ll probably only have time to go over around 30 of them…


Talk story with someone you run into at the gas station for an hour

Feel guilty about not going outside for the day

Only OAHU—
We are more concerned about how long it will take to get somewhere, not how many miles. With traffic it’s not the miles that matters its that hour in traffic we dread.

We don’t go on the H1 Highway during morning or evening rush hour unless we have no choice

We pay no attention to time in Hawaii unless it involves work and even then we are usually late.

Most of us don’t consider ourselves part of the United States and we refer to Hawaii as the Rock or God Country and the other 48 States as the Mainland…We consider Alaska its own Country and call it Alaska.

We love Spam and make anything and everything with it while the mainland thinks its gross.

We don’t give directions, we use land marks…like park your car at the Kahana fish pond, walk across the street, walk past the yellow shrimp truck then go left at the yellow no hiking sign.

We are very selective when it comes to eating dessert. Malasada’s, Shave Ice, Mochi ice cream, Coco Puffs…etc

When it gets to be in the 60’s in the Winter people in Hawaii are freezing and so they get their winter cloths out like boots, socks over our slippahs, jackets, hoodies, pullovers, sweaters and beanie hats

We don’t watch the sports news or weather in Hawaii as our sport teams suck…but if there is a big swell, we’ll check the weather for the surf, but the rest of the year why bother our weather is always perfect out.

When on the beach getting a tan and it starts to rain we stay and wait it out for 10-15 mins while everyone else packs up and we have the beach to ourselves after the quick shower stops.

We call anyone older than us Auntie or Uncle even though they are not related. We also call friends Cousin, Braddah or Sistah

We don’t have Flip-Flops…we have Slippers cuz we slip them off and on all day and when we go in and out of the house.

It’s not called Soy Sauce here in Hawaii…it’s called Shoyu

It’s a constant struggle arguing with your friends on which beach to go to…the struggle is real.

We just don’t go to the Movies and get Buttered Popcorn…We get the Hawaiian Hurricane Crunchy Mochi seaweed and Buttered popcorn mix.

Here in Hawaii we don’t care what we wear as long a it’s comfortable and laid back and we don’t care what you think either

There is no LEFT or RIGHT in Hawaii only MAUKA or MAKAI…Toward the mountain or ocean

We live with Geckos in our homes…they eat all the bugs and they are good luck cuz the Gecko comes from the Mo’o, the Lizard Aumakua and spiritual protector

We gather our own food, from friends, family and our aina may it be while hiking or in our backyards or hunting or fishing. The rest we shop for. It’s just too expensive.

We eat Rice and Mac Salad with most our meals

I haven’t been to the beach in forever means you haven’t been to the beach for a week.

We run our cars in Hawaii on empty and try to push the limits on that.

We replace tires, brakes and suspension parts on our cars more often than anyone because of our horrible roads and potholes.

We bitch and complain we’ll never see our favorite band in concert…and we won’t…they never come to Hawaii…never!

We know down to which day of year Ants, Roaches, Centipedes and Millipedes come out of the wood work to haunt us

We call ants the Black Ninjas of the night and Sharks the Tax collector

Only we know how dirty Waikiki beach is and so we don’t swim there

Only on OAHU can we not find parking and when we do it’s for COMPACT CARS only when most of us have SUV’s or Trucks

We’ll eat whatever is on sale during $5 Friday and make every effort to eat as many tacos as we can on $2 Taco Tuesday

We don’t share secret spots with our friends cuz they will tell their friends and then no more secret, but we’ll tell visitors cuz you’ll never find the place on your own when you come back